Dirt
by MonquiC-MonquiDoo
Summary: Ash goes digging for dirt on Morgead and gets suprising results.
1. Chapter 1

Ash Redfern was bored. Since Ash was known as a prankster, that was never good. So the Daybreakers did everything they could to keep him entertained.

They baked cookies, scrapbooked, played Scrabble. Eric had even taught Ash how to knit sweaters and potholders. But sometimes the bordem comes and doesn't go untill he taught one of the pansy guys who was boss.

Ash sat down to consult his list. Let's see : Eric,check. David, check. Quinn, check. Theirry, check. Morgead, no check. Ohh, very interesting. He rubbed his hands together diobolically ( like he was putting on Germ Ex) and sashayed over to his file cabinet. He then flipped through the files untill he found the one he was looking for.

Ash hummed " Ur So Gay" as he opened "Morgead Blackthorn"'s file. What kind of last name was that? Well with a last name like Redfern, he figured he shouldn't be so judging. The catchy tune came to a sudden halt as he saw the file was blank. He had no dirt on Blackthorn!

A smilt the Chershire Cat would be proud of crept over Ash's face. No info, huh? Well he would have to change that soon, wouldn't he?  
>_<p>

Ash crept down the hallway to Jez and Morgead's room. When Eric and David walked by, he jumped behind a potted plant.

"Well she's so obviously meant to be with him, duh Eric!" said David.

" Yeahm but Jacob can't kill her when they make out."

" Yes he can! Eric, she said "Ow! after they liplocked."

" Only because she punched him and his rock-hard abs broke her fragile fist!" argued Eric.

Ash could barely contain his laughter. Dear Lord, the pansies were talking about Twilight. That was incredibley pansy-like, even for them. He made a mental note to be sure to add it to their file. Oh, the fun he was going to have with that bit of information. But he wasn't supposed to be gathering info for Eric and David's file, he was gathering info for the mysterious Morgead Blackthorn's file. Time to get back to work.

When he got to the door of Jez and Morgead's room, Ash looked around for a " Do Not Disturb" sign. Ugh, just thinking of it made him shudder. Who would ever think sweet, innocent, little Gillian could be so... dirty?

Surpressing the memory, Ash waltzed into the room. Then he began his search of dirt on Morgead.

_30 MINUTES LATER_

Ash slumped to the floor next to the bed. Damn, where is anything to make fun of?

Then he saW IT.

With an evil grin, Ash stuck his hand under the bed. Was it what he thought it was? Sweet Lord Almighty, it was! But was it Morgead's? Yep, it said so right on the box in black sharpie. If Jez knew what was under her bed, she's have a mental breakdown. Morgead was sooo screwed.

Alrighty people, how's the story? I'd love a review ;) FYI, this is gonna be a guesses on what Ash has found? As Rufus off of So Random says

" You're not gonna believe this!"

I'll update on Thursday!


	2. Chapter 2

Ash's laughter was interupted by the sound of footsteps coming down the hall. He froze, because, well, he was in a Wild Power AND a vampire's room, both who were ex gang members. Ash wasn't the brightest crayola in the box, but even HE knew that that was not a good combination.

Hurriedly, he climbed into the closet and waited. The door opened and someone who smelled like kerosene came into the room mumbling about ways to kill the people that ran Casey's. The person walked over to the closet and opened the door. Morgead.

For his credit, Ash didn't scream. A surprised look came over Blackthorn's face. " What the hell are you doing in my closet?"

Ash remembered what he was holding then grinned. " Morgead, it is I that should be asking the questions. Like, why is the sky blue? Why is the grass green? And what is this doing under your bed?" With a flourish, Ash pulled a blonde Barbie doll out from behind his back.

Morgead gasped. " What are you doing with Brittney? Don't drop her, she's a limited edition collector's item!"

" Does Jez know that Brittney is under your bed?" Wow, that sounded wrong.

" No! And you can't tell her either!" said Morgead.

" Of course not. As long as you do one favor for me."

" I'll do anything, just don't tell Jez!"

```````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````` Morgead looked at his new sparkly self in the mirror. He was donning a brown wig and golden contacts, and he looked ridiculous. But if this was the only way for Jez not to find out about Brittney the Barbie, then that was what he was going to do. " What am I supposed to do again?" asked Morgead.

" Just go up to Eric and David and say hi."

" That's it?" questioned Morgead. It sounded too good to be true.

"Yep." said Ash. He couldn't wait to see what David & Eric thought of Morgead Cullen.

Thanks to everyone who read, reviewed, and commented. I'm sorry this is so short, but I lost the second chapter. 


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